To Ethiopia With Love Part 2

 Read Part 1 Here......

It was now 2pm Tuesday afternoon and the phone rang for us.  It was Yonas.  "Uh yes Dawson, this is Yonas, Sisay is downstairs waiting for you.  He will bring you to my home." We knew Sisay from the previous trip. Sisay is a wonderful man; humble, caring, and a great historian of the city of Addis.  Sisay was also great because he was a bit quirky and had a lot of what I call "Sisayisms." For example, every time Sisay wanted to tell me something while we were driving, he would reach across his cab and grab my leg.  Then he would say “Dawson, this is where.....such and such is.”  Sisay called me “Dawson” and called Kerri “Sister.”  And aside from grabbing my leg every 10 seconds to tell me something, my favorite Sisayism is “with the will of God.”  He said it all the time and it made me smile.  There is something different about the way Sisay says it.  I think it sounded different from Sisay because he truly believes it in every situation.  We knew we were in good hands with Sisay.


As we neared our destination, Sisay pulled over to call Yonas.  He had to find out exactly where Yonas lived and finding a home in Addis is not like finding a home in the states.  In Addis, there are main streets and then everything in between are homes that are pretty much slums.  In fact, I read somewhere that between 80-90% of Addis is made up of Slums.  On our first trip we had seen firsthand the conditions of these slums and were left in shock.  The homes were extremely small and lacked any kind of amenities.  As we had accepted the invite from Yonas both Kerri and I both understood exactly where we were going.  We knew that Yonas' home would be small in scale and that it would probably consist of dirt floors and perhaps no electricity.  And so we were prepared for what were were going to experience. Sisay spoke with Yonas on the phone and we waited...

After a few minutes of waiting Yonas popped out into the street and jumped in the car.  It was raining out and the roads were muddy.  We drove down the road and took the turn into Yonas' neighborhood.  After a few moments driving on some very sketchy roads filled with potholes and sludgy mud, we arrived at Yonas’ home. 


When we arrived, Yonas quickly jumped out of Sisay's car and ran inside.  He quickly returned with an umbrella and he escorted us in.  Sisay was invited in as well but left us to our experience.  When we walked in we were introduced to Yonas’ wife Esther, Yonas’ 2 year old son Kebrone, Esther’s sister (who lived with them also), and Yonas’ one month old baby (yet to be named).  Having been prepared to see the living conditions I was actually pleasantly surprised at the arrangement.  The home was about 12 foot by 12 foot, 144 sq ft in total.  Long grasses lay over the clay floor and the walls were a blue cement color. There was a bed in one corner, two armoires in another, two chairs, a couch, a mattress on the floor, and a tv.  In the middle of the small room was the display for the ceremony.  A small tin filled with coals in the center of the room was for roasting coffee beans. The display was complete with a traditional meal, popcorn, and bananas. 

The ceremony began with the roasting of the coffee beans over hot coals.  Once the beans were roasted they were poured into a clay pot with water which was then placed back on the coals.  During the ceremony Esther’s sister brought a meal of Injera (traditional Ethiopian spongy bread) and two traditional Ethiopian dishes.  We hadn’t expected a full meal and having been sick the for the previous 24 hours I nervously ate what was a delicious meal.  Elsa sat quietly and as usual ate Kerri and I under the table.  As we ate I noticed that Esther stayed busy the whole time attending to us, Yonas, and the Kids.  Esther’s sister took a special liking to Elsa and she played with her as we continued the conversation.  We talked about many things but mostly just listened to Yonas talk about life and Ethiopia.

When the meal was finished, I asked if they had decided on the final name for their baby.  Esther perked up very giddy and rattled off three names and their biblical meanings.  Even after 3 translation attempts I still could not understand all of the meanings of the names. After Esther said the names Yonas said “now that we have heard the names we will collect them and then choose.”  What Yonas was saying was that they wanted to hear what names we liked and then they would write those names down on a piece of paper and then choose a piece of paper.  Kerri was first and she choose Aldana.  For my turn I chose the name Cypara  (see-para).  Esther smiled when we said the names and she said she liked Aldana as well.  Yonas then wrote the two names on a small piece of graph paper.  After carefully rolling them up he put them on a plate in front of Elsa.  After some encouragement Elsa grabbed one of the papers and gave it to me.  Yonas said, “Dawson, you read the name.”  The name was Cypara!

It was about that time that it hit me... I was already honored to be welcomed into their home and cooked for.  It was a sacrificial kind of service that they were providing Kerri and I.  It was their way of showing their gratitude for the things that we had done.  I was extremely humbled that they would give us the honor of this ceremony and that they allowed us to participate in the naming of their second born.  It was a moment I will remember all my life and it was a moment that captured a beautiful picture of the Ethiopia that I had come to know and love. 

Ethiopia is a place that will visually shock you when see it and when you begin to understand some of the challenges that the Ethiopian people face you are left asking how will, how does, how can Ethiopia rise above the lack of resources or infrastructure to be a strong nation? The answer, “with the will of God.”  While Ethiopia is poor in infrastructure and resources it has people who love their country and who have a hope that you and I don't often see.   Their faith and hope that God will provide resides in their spirits and is evident in the way that they serve.  Their gifts are sacrificial on a different level and what Yonas and Esther were showing us was what it was like to truly serve another person and think of them as greater than yourself.  We forgot the surroundings and enjoyed our time.  This was our family and it was something I will always cherish. 


As we finished our 3rd round of coffee (as traditional ceremonies go) it was time to leave.  Thinking it would be some time before he arrived I asked Yonas to call Sisay to take us back.  To my surprise Sisay was there in a couple minutes.  When I commented about how quickly he arrived he told us that he had been waiting around the corner “for our comfort.”  As we said our goodbyes I handed some of our adoption bracelets out to some of the Kids who lived in the neighborhood.  On them is imprinted “To Ethiopia with Love,” the title of our adoption story. We began our drive back down the bumpy road. I told Sisay that the roads must be tough on his tires to which he replied, “for you it is nothing.”  Then he handed us two bags of items that he had bought for us while we were with Yonas’ family.  His gestures and generosity were so kind and sincere, again my heart was warmed.  


On the way home I thought to myself what a perfect culmination to our trip. Kerri and I had experienced Ethiopia in an incredible and unique way.  We were so grateful!  Then came something that I didn’t expect.  The guilt.


I began to think about all of the wonderful parts of Ethiopia that Elsa will never know because we were taking her from her home.  Not to say that I was regretful but I truly felt a loss for her that is hard to describe.  Lucky for me the “Sisay Program,” as Sisay would call it, was not over.  Sisay called to Kerri, “Sister, I told your husband yesterday after I took him shopping that I wanted to take him for a very special beer.   He ignored me because he said that he had to get back to you and Elsa at the Hotel. Can I take you now?”  Sisay had driven me and another couple just 1 day earlier to Sole Rebels retail shop (think Ethiopian Toms) and when we were on our way home he had asked but I didn’t want to be gone too long.  Sisay came with a different plan this time, go straight to the boss.  I looked back at Kerri after he had asked and she said “Sure!” To which I replied, "as long as there is a bathroom near."


After a short drive from our location we ended up in an area of government housing which looked kind of like the Projects in the United States but compared they were actually quite nice.  At the bottom of the building was a small bar called Kiru Bar and Restaurant.  We went inside with Elsa in tow and the stares came.  The owner welcomed us in and sat us down.  I attempted to order a draft beer to which Sisay replied, “no you want their Special Beer.”  I wasn’t about to argue.  While we waited for the beers I was anxious to check out the facilities just in case my stomach wouldn’t hold up anymore.  Kerri handed me Elsa and said, “she needs to go too.” Sisay walked me to the back to show me where the toilets were and both doors were locked.  At the time I didn’t really know why but the workers were staring at me smiling.  I thought they were being polite until I entered one of the stalls.  Ah yes, as if i needed one more Ethiopian experience.


 Picture a porcelain bowl sunk in the ground.  It was a “Squatter!”  No toilet paper, just a hose with a sprayer attachment.  Elsa was first! I sat her squat style over the potty staring down at the hole that still had “stuff” in it and I thought, “I’m done with this! Elsa has a pull up and I can wait.”  We exited the facilities to the still staring workers and we just played it cool.  Elsa and I returned to our seats as if to say, no problem.  Kerri quickly asked me where the bathroom was to which I just pointed and smiled.  She must have been 3 shades whiter when she came out of there and I knew just what had happened.  Kerri had walked into that bathroom, saw that crazy situation and walked right out. I was laughing so hard inside but Sisay was still around so I couldn’t say anything.  As soon as Sisay left for a minute though I looked at Kerri and said, “you didn’t go to the bathroom did you.”  To which she promptly responded “nope!"  It was just the thing I needed to ease my mind, some mindless Ethiopian potty story.  It didn’t last that long though as my thoughts returned to Elsa and Ethiopia.


As we sat and talked the beers arrived and the name was in fact, “special beer.”  I had to smile that Sisay was telling me to get their special beer and that turned out to be the name of the beer.  We drank and talked, Elsa was busy looking at one of the ladies who was gesturing to her from another table.  She was saying “conjoe” in amharic to Elsa which means pretty.  Then she said some things in amharic to Sisay who replied in Amharic.  Then the lady said, “God bless you.”  Sisay would later tell me that she asked if we were adopting and if we had any kids of our own.  


Some time passed and Sisay and I talked some more.  I told Sisay that I felt guilty for taking Elsa from her country.  Then Sisay asked me, “do you know what she is saying when she said God bless you?  Thinking that the answer was too obvious I waited for him to proceed.  “She is saying that God will bless you and your family for this wonderful thing that you have done.  You know that Elsa did not have a family before and now she has a family.  You brought her up from the ground.”  What he meant is that before us she had nothing and now she has much more. 


Sisay pointed to Kerri and Elsa who were walking in the courtyard.  “You see she has a mother, and her mother will care for her and you will care for her.”  It must have been the day for lessons in humility but I was again truly humbled by what that lady and what Sisay were saying.  I felt a sense of warmth in my heart that what Sisay, and Yonas had taught me about hope was something that was now tangible for Elsa.  And that, in a lot of respects, is the truth about adoption.  With adoption great hope comes with tremendous loss.  Too soon our time was over.  Sisay had paid for all of the drinks and had ordered a pizza to go without us even knowing. We headed back to the hotel.

On the way back Sisay thanked "Sister" for letting us go out.  He told her that he was proud that I had chosen to go back to her and Elsa the day before after our shopping trip.  “You see Sister, that is what a real man does.”  Again my heart smiled.  For being a taxi driver Sisay sure had a way with words and it seemed like every one of them just struck a cord.  On top of that his generosity and warm heart had left its mark on me. 


Kerri and I returned to the hotel.  We had a wonderful day and we just looked at each other like, “what an incredible experience.”  Sisay, Yonas, Esther, Kebrone, Cypara helped us to understand what Ethiopia is all about.  They will always remain in our hearts and will forever be a part of our adoption journey.